Tips on Improving Communication in the Group

Often decision-making bogs down because communication is not occurring in a productive way. People may think that they understand what someone has said but they do not.

• Thinking those around you have heard and understood, what you have said when they have not.
• Thinking you have heard and understood what others have said, when you may have only understood part of it.
• Trying to persuade others without being open to persuasion and learning in return.
• Advocating for your own ideas but not inquiring into the ideas and interests of others. There must be a balance between advocacy and true inquiry for good communication to occur.

It is human nature that people begin to shut down when they do not feel listened to and respected. If you find that people in the group are talking at each other rather than with each other, consider making the following suggestions:

• Everyone ask a question for clarification before suggesting an alternative.
• Try building on ideas rather than trying to replace them.
• Acknowledge (at least to yourself) some positive potential in each statement before spelling out its flaws.
• Make sure you explain the data and facts you are considering rather than just stating your conclusions. To be persuasive, you should be aware of and able to explain your own chain of reasoning.
• Clarify what you think you have heard by paraphrasing what you think the other person has just said to you - this is helpful for several reasons.
  1. It helps you pay attention while others are talking,
  2. It enhances your understanding when you have to put an argument in your own words, and
  3. When someone hears their comments through someone else's voice, they often make clarifications that they did not even think of the first time.
• Avoid asking closed questions such as "Don't you think...?" or "Do you understand?" The answers to these questions are almost always "yes" or "no" and as such, they are not helpful in the pursuit of mutual understanding. What you really want to ask if you are interested in open communication are questions such as, "What do you think of...?" and "What can I explain further?"
• Consider capturing the discussion on a flip chart or a piece of paper that you can all see. When an idea is written down it takes on a reality that is often missed when words are zinging by. Try writing down each other's points to ensure that you each understand the meaning behind them.

Stages of the Collaborative Process

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